Saturday, November 25, 2006

Thanksgiving is for the birds


Screw it, there is no need to try to deny it. I missed having Thanksgiving this year. No turkey, no mashed potatoes, no gravy soaked stuffing. I missed out and that bums me out because I love to eat. Then I remembered all the crappy things that have happened to me on Thanksgiving; from family feuds to family deaths from exploding turkeys to tryptophan hangovers. This year, I stayed on my couch in my apartment and watched crappy movies on TV. On the bright side of things, a friend on mine who once invited me up to his house for thanksgiving, gave me a box of booze yesterday. Now I have 4 bottles of very nice red wine, 2 bottles of very nice white wine, and 2 bottles of champagne that I've seen served for more than $100 dollars a bottle. The point is that booze is always there for you, even if turkey and stuffing isn't.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Lasse Gjertsen



So this guy is cool, right?

Wednesday, November 08, 2006

I stay in bed after elections

I should be working, or eating, or walking the dog today. I am not doing any of these things.

On Nov 4th, 2004, I stayed in bed all day and trembled in fear of having W in the White House for another 4 years. I remember sweating under my blanket, and shivering with cold spells. I didn't get anything accomplished that day. I got out of bed two days after the election.

At 10pm on Nov 7th, 2006, I sat in a dive bar, eating onion rings, sipping PBR, and watching votes come in on a small, poorly color balanced, muted TV directly over the heads of 3 old bluegrass musicians in a dive bar around the corner from my house. Sloppy Joes were only $3 as part of a Tuesday night special. I watched with awe as the Dems won the House, and slowly creep towards the Senate, all to the tune of "My Momma Was a Truck Driving Man" and "Who's That Knocking On My Door (Bad News)" and "I Ain't Broke, I'm Badly Bent." I went to sleep around 4am, slightly giddy about the outcome of the elections. But there was a twinge in my smile, a curl to my lip as I fell asleep, and that twitch came from big corporate money. The Dems won big, that is good. At the moment, they are trust worthy, but that's because they didn't have any power in the House or the Senate, or at least they didn't have enough power to get anything done under the War Hawk talons of the GOP. The thing that gets me is what I heard in passing on CNN while trying to mix a crappy cover band and listen to the votes come in before I gave up and just went to the pub. Corporate America put a lot of money into the Dems this year and will have some pull over the politics of the party, which is not unlike every time a party wins power with the help of corporate contributions, legal or otherwise. Anyone could foresee a shift in power (except for W) and being a large contributor for the right side (read as 'correct side' or 'left side') of politics will have it's benefits; and I'm not talking about a thank you letter or gift certificate to Bed Bath and Beyond. So what will happen? Will we see the tax cuts that W put into effect left in place until the Dems lose power again? Will there be accidental tax or environmental loopholes for the contributors to find and exploit? Most likely, yes. The Democrats have Legislative power. Power corrupts everyone. Corruption fucks lil' people like you and me (unless your not as little as me at which point I think you're lost on the web. Go back, man. Go back!). Corporations pour money into a political party that will gain power. That money buys political pull for the Corporation. Policy swing towards money. So, the money I don't have makes my life harder because the people who spent the money I don't have on a political party are gonna fuck me over once the money that they spent starts working for them. It all boils down to the fact that I just don't trust anyone, which makes me nervous. So nervous that I stay in bed after elections.

Saturday, November 04, 2006

A poem to live by

Once again, my father has made my day. It's funny to think about how much time can change perception, how scorn can change to respect, how family sacrifices proximity closeness for emotional closeness, and how spell check doesn't matter when you know how to spell. After a long day of work, and before another long day of work, I received this breath of fresh air in e-mail form. I'll share it with you and ask you to send it to someone that means something to you. I'm a sucker for the sappy stuff sometimes.


"How to Live" by Charles Harper Webb, from Amplified Dog. © Red Hen Press.
           "I don't know how to live."
                                                  –Sharon Olds

Eat lots of steak and salmon and Thai curry and mu shu
pork and fresh green beans and baked potatoes
and fresh strawberries with vanilla ice cream.
Kick-box three days a week. Stay strong and lean.
Go fly-fishing every chance you get, with friends

who'll teach you secrets of the stream. Play guitar
in a rock band. Read Dostoyevsky, Whitman, Kafka,
Shakespeare, Twain. Collect Uncle Scrooge comics.
See Peckinpah's Straw Dogs, and everything Monty Python made.
Love freely. Treat ex-partners as kindly

as you can. Wish them as well as you're able.
Snorkel with moray eels and yellow tangs. Watch
spinner dolphins earn their name as your panga slam-
bams over glittering seas. Try not to lie; it sours
the soul. But being a patsy sours it too. If you cause

a car wreck, and aren't hurt, but someone is, apologize
silently. Learn from your mistake. Walk gratefully
away. Let your insurance handle it. Never drive drunk.
Don't be a drunk, or any kind of "aholic." It's bad
English, and bad news. Don't berate yourself. If you lose

a game or prize you've earned, remember the winners
history forgets. Remember them if you do win. Enjoy
success. Have kids if you want and can afford them,
but don't make them your reason-to-be. Spare them that
misery. Take them to the beach. Mail order sea

monkeys once in your life. Give someone the full-on
ass-kicking he (or she) has earned. Keep a box turtle
in good heath for twenty years. If you get sick, don't thrive
on suffering. There's nothing noble about pain. Die
if you need to, the best way you can. (You define best.)

Go to church if it helps you. Grow tomatoes to put store-
bought in perspective. Listen to Elvis and Bach. Unless
you're tone deaf, own Perlman's "Meditation from Thais."
Don't look for hidden meanings in a cardinal's song.
Don't think TV characters talk to you; that's crazy.

Don't be too sane. Work hard. Loaf easily. Have good
friends, and be good to them. Be immoderate
in moderation. Spend little time anesthetized. Dive
the Great Barrier Reef. Don't touch the coral. Watch
for sea snakes. Smile for the camera. Don't say "Cheese."


I'd only add the following -
Spill some blood, then donate blood and see which
feels better. Water your plants. Clean your room. Call
someone a jerk. Stop saying the word "um," it only slows
you down. Rant and rave about something. Write a letter.
Read a book and then give it away. Spend some time

in a boat. Get caught in a thunderstorm. Build a fire and watch
it go out. Play on the swings. Rearrange your furniture.
Drink some wine on a rooftop, or a mountaintop. Wear
Band-aids with little devil duck prints on them. Make up a word.
Walk to work. Lie to your boss, once. Laugh long and hard at life.