Wednesday, June 18, 2008

Sketchy Mustache Competition – or – I Only Get Good Ideas When I’m Naked

Maybe I’m on a posting rampage. Maybe I’m afraid of what will happen next month. Maybe I need to get out more and find something besides books, laundry and YouTube to entertain me. Maybe it’s bunnies.

I am currently hosting, and winning, the 2nd annual Sketchy Mustache Competition. I don’t know how long the competition will last, or if there are any rules besides grow a sketchy mustache, or what the prize for the sketchiest mustache will be, or who the judges will be, or who else besides me is competing. I’m still working on the details. And I’m still beating the competition, hands down. I didn’t shave for a month. Then I did, just now. I have to be at work in 2 minutes but I wanted to show you the new look. Enjoy!

6/18/08 4:07pm

Van Campbell has entered the competition. Van is the drummer in the clearly bad ass band, The Black Diamond Heavies. Here is his submission with his approved caption.
Kung Fu Van Campbell
"I'm a gay cop"

5/18/08 5:37pm

My Brother, Adam, has entered the competition only because he has "no social obligations for about a month." I believe he will be going for the '14 year-old who can't really grow a mustache but has a bunch of clumps of hair above his lip' look. Good luck, Adam!

5/19/08 2:02am

"Let the sketchiness begin. I accept your challenge. Although, you have a 3-week head start on me, my mustache will be so sketchy that it will actually be illegal for me to operate a van within 200 yards of a school zone."

5/20/08 12:07am

I have noticed two things after my first day out and about with the sketchy 'stache.
1)This thing itches
2)More than a handful of friends and co-workers have gone out of their way to say, "No, Officer. I don't know how fast I was going."

5/20/08 3:54am

I have invited Lis, a good friend of mine from college who has seen me in a cowboy hat and a neon blue speedo track suit, to participate in this, the most noble of contests. She has not yet responded, so I thought the following image might help. This is my temporary entry for Lis into the 2nd Annual Sketchy Mustache Competition. I might have created a monster. A sexy, fashionable, well mannered yet scruffy and surprisingly dapper (for a lady with a mustache) monster. Lord help us all.

6/25/08 8:17pm

1) 2 co-workers, a band-mate, my old boss and my best friend from grade school have stopped shaving and joined the competition.
2) Still no work from Mustache-Lis. I expect to hear from her soon.
3) Join us.

7/8/08 2:06am

Adam, my brother, sent me this picture...

That is sketchy.
Join the competition. Pass judgment on the competitors. Submit photos or votes via the "comment" button and I will gladly, and sheepishly, publish your opinions as facts. Fake mustaches are approved and encouraged for the facially impaired.


  1. Anonymous8:41 AM

    bitch. I vote for myself clearly.Although I have to say that the gay cop stache' is bloddy awesome. Oh, yea...I can say bloody because I HAVE A BRITISH ADMRIAL'S MUSTACHE...natch.

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  3. Frost1:24 PM

    my stash isnt sketchy cause its just awesome. Im kinda scared that so many people just want me to keep it even when this contest ends. Are they implying that I'm inherently sketchy and the stash just fits?