Monday, January 05, 2009

Resume Building, Schmesume Building – or – I’m So Easily Distracted By Boobs… I Mean Art

Don Frio sent me this completely inappropriate for work link while I was working on my resume so that I can get a new job and feed my seven children. Productivity instantly grinded to a standstill and my children are all jerks.

Mostly, this site is about boobs and how great they are, mostly. There are a few other points (tehehe) that are brought up from time to time. Here are some examples of the knowledge of the ages that resides within this website's dominion.

“Everything is a self-portrait. A diary. Your whole drug history in a strand of your hair. Your fingernails. The forensic details. The lining of your stomach is a document. The calluses on your hand tell all your secrets. Your teeth give you away. Your accent. The wrinkles around your mouth and eyes. Everything you do shows your hand.”
- Chuck Palahniuk

“When you can’t imagine how things are going to change, that doesn’t mean that nothing will change. It means that things will change in ways that are unimaginable.”
- Bruce Sterling, in his annual and excellent State of the World discussion

“I fucking love it! Not the song, but the fact that this Grammy nominated piece of shit is a full fledged phenomenon sung and emulated by children and pre-teens all across America. Why? Because it advocates cumming on a “ho’s” back and then putting the bed sheet on her so that when it dries it resembles a cape.”
- David Cross, regarding Soulja Boy’s “Crank Dat”

“A grown-ass man should be able to change a tire, drive stick, do CPR, set a bone, gut a fish, build a wall, throw a punch, shoot a gun, shotgun a beer, build a fire, run a barbecue, change a diaper, recite three lines from Animal House, light a fart, and eat a pussy.”
- Vice Dos & Don’ts


  1. Anonymous9:11 PM

    I'm shit at driving stick and I would leave setting bones to the pro's ... ;-) Love, gabe

  2. When you send your resume out to potential employers, the will be able to look at THIS BLOG and decide whether or not to hire you. Probably not hire you after they watch you get trashed making bread. True story.