I’m not nervous that I will take a dump on my floor. I know for a fact that that scenario, although possessing momentarily high levels of self-amusement, and could potentially draw a large number of people that don’t fucking mater (just like you) to this site, is highly unlikely to ever happen. What I am nervous about is the dissemination of my mood swings, which are becoming increasingly more drastic and unpredictable. What I am nervous about is that I’m leading my real life in a similar fashion to the one on this online swamp of self-deprecating, self-celebrating, self-centered selfishness. For instance, over the last week, I made three videos about mostly nothing beyond my own "three inches off the ground" carefree life and my self-induced madness. In the real world, I must have told twenty people how hard it is to find a job these days. In the real world, I talk about school, about politics, about my disdain for the general population, and how I feel the world is cursed. I am no closer to having a new job, even though work has picked up on the jobs that I have. How many times did I go out during that time period? How many ways can I avoid the need for me to stop focusing on me as I am right now, and change something fundamentally wrong, my own personal fatal character flaw, so that I don’t live my life like the crazy, pissed off, happy-go-lucky, simpleton that I cast myself as in my fun little videos? When am I going to apply to Grad School? When am I going to volunteer at the learning center? What the fuck am I waiting for? A script change?
The Grunt (Part 1) by The J.B.'s (James Brown's Band)
The Steelers Didn't Win The Superbowl, I Did
Rex by Ratatat
I Had The Longest Weekend